Relationship Issues
Why Fighting Over Who’s Right Is the Wrong Approach
Connection happens when both of you are able to receive what the other is actually saying or experiencing in the present moment. When are we projecting versus connecting with our partners? When you and your partner argue, do you find yourselves fighting over who is right and who is [...]
Is Your Relationship Too Good to Leave, and Also Too Bad to Stay? How to Work with Ambivalence
While it may seem that your ambivalence is about your partner’s qualities or behaviors, it is ultimately about you. It is painful to wrestle with the ambivalence of being caught between the “yes” and the “no.” In some moments, the answer feels so clear; you cannot live without your [...]
3 Things to Ask Yourself Before Arguing with Your Partner
Ideally, a good, productive argument leaves both parties feeling more understood and closer. If you’re in a relationship and you have a pulse, you’re going to have disagreements with your partner. It’s inevitable. And, in my opinion, it is perfectly healthy to disagree, and even argue, with your partner [...]
How Infertility Can Make Your Relationship Stronger
This is the perfect time to work on being your best self in your relationship. Are you and your partner experiencing fertility issues? You’re not alone. Nearly one in six U.S. couples has trouble conceiving. As a marriage counselor, I often work with people struggling with fertility and, unfortunately, [...]
Navigating Open Relationships, Part 1: “Is this for us?”
Open relationships can yield opportunities to expand your sexuality, exercise freedom, and jump out of comfort zones. People often approach relationships like fad diets: they want to sign up and reap the rewards, but underestimate the work that it entails. It’s not an easy road, and there are no [...]
Why You and Your Partner Have Different Versions of Your Last Fight
Our emotions are a result of our interpretations of a situation, not the situation itself. Jack and Betty come to their second couples counseling session obviously tense. "So what happened?" I ask. Jack sighs and Betty says, "You were so mean to me last night! You were angry and [...]